Resolutions

Originally posted as a note on Facebook.

I drove for a few hours today already and while I was driving I thought about the meaning of resolutions, and what I want mine to be this year.  I think that resolving to do something should be for the benefit of yourself first and foremost.  The happiness of others will radiate from your journey to personal happiness.  So, in discord with my past new year resolutions, which have always been to make someone else happy, or to become more successful, or to do some other thing for someone other than myself, this year, my resolutions are to make myself a better and more completely happy person.  I finally realize that happiness comes from within, and the only person that you really need to be proud of you is yourself.

I resolve to do the following this year, whether they are completed or not, I'll see!  Not in any particular order, here they are:

1. I want to write a book. This is the one that I doubt will be finished this year. 
2. I will make at least 1 piece of art a month.  *Not including my photoshop projects, of course :)
3. I want to start working on photography again
4. I'll take at least 1 afternoon a week for me.  Personal time with no distractions of work or projects - quality time with myself. 
5. I want to reconnect with friends that I've fallen out of touch with. 

I encourage you all to keep me accountable for any and all of these!  (Also, I hope that you will choose to take the same approach when making your resolutions this year.) 

Christmas - Pagan or Religious?

Christmas Part 1

This Christmas has been something different all around.  For the first time, I've started to consider (thanks Brian. . .) whether the religious holiday we have all been brought up to celebrate is really what we think it is at all.  The long story short: Christmas eve morning, Brian and I were discussing several things in the Bible.  He stated that he watched a documentary once that showed Christmas as being invented by the Romans (it was actually the Winter Solstice) and the day of Christmas actually falls on the 25th because that was the last day of the Winter Solstice.  During the Winter Solstice, people were permitted to commit any mortal sin they wished to, and on the 25th they had to remember Christ who died for their sins and repent.  I agree that Christmas today is not what it was meant to be originally, but really?  Am I supposed to believe that we are not supposed to celebrate the birth of Christ at all? 

The debate found its way to Facebook, where two other friends joined in.  My brother's high school English Teacher brought up the point (with a source, of course!) that according to "The Man Who Invented Christmas" by Chip Wood (I'm sure that's a made up name, by the way),  Christmas was made to be a "big deal" (more or less) by Charles Dickens who wrote A Christmas Carol. Before 1843, Christmas wasn't really a holiday.  After self-publishing the book, it was adapted to a play - and the rest is history!  Everyone knows the story, and it's been remade year after year.  I even participated in the play when I was in 6th grade.  (Not a main role, of course.)

About the same time, a friend from my Lon Morris College Days (Meghan) said: "It's not the fact that it's pagan, it's the fact that the early Christians adopted a lot of pagan traditions a). because that was all they knew and b). because they wanted people to convert. The date December 25th was actually the birthday of the god Mithras, who was the god of Mithraism, a competing monotheistic religion during the same time as early Christianity. The actual date of Jesus Christ's birthday has been known to be in the summer time. Therefore the Christians adopted the December 25th date to try and outshine Mithraism. Certainly the tradition of decorating a tree is pagan."

Personally, I do not disagree that we definitely have adopted some very materialistic traditions, but the fact remainst that every Christmas morning, my dad would wake my brother and I up, and after all the excitement of opening our presents was over, he would sit us down at the kitchen table and read us the Christmas story straight from the bible.  I think that maybe we should remember Christmas for the real reason for the season, whether we choose to celebrate it in December, or otherwise, and that is that God gave us his son, he was a gift to this world.  My point still remains: yes, the Roman Catholics may have invented Christmas to atone themselves for their dirty-rotten sinning, but remembering that God gave his son is still important.  If we remember that, it doesn't matter what silly pagan traditions we adopt - our hearts are in the right place.  You might call me silly, or ignorant, but I have faith!  And I wont call you silly or ignorant for what you believe in. 

http://www.personalliberty.com/straight-talk/the-man-who-invented-christmas/

http://www.vexen.co.uk/religion/mithraism.html
http://www.religioustolerance.org/xmas_tree.htm

Christmas Part 2

On Christmas Day, I ate dinner twice.  Something I don't normally do.  I ate with my family, and then that evening I ate with Brian's family (his dad's side).  He didn't tell me before we went that I was the first girl he'd ever brought to ANY family event, but his uncles told me.  I'm not sure exactly what to think about it, and he claims that he didn't tell me that because he didn't want it to go to my head.  But it did - not in a negative way, but in a "he actually really does care about me, enough to bring me around his family, and even if he doesn't always act like he cares" kind of way. 

People never cease to surprise me.

Reflections - Fall, 2011

Well, here it is - post grad. 

My father and I

I've been sitting back the past few days, reveling in the glory of not having to go back to school, of being "done." It's been nice to spend time doing things I just haven't had time to do lately - watching movies, sitting and talking with my dad, playing video games with my boyfriend, sleeping, and even cleaning the microwave!  But in that time I've been thinking also - about a few things the past semester has taught me.  My last semester of my B.B.A. taught me four things:

The Rising Phoenix Project logo.
By Cassandra Bartley

1. Never think you know exactly what you want to do.  My last semester in school taught me that.  I went in thinking, "all I have left is 4 months - then USAF and a career in HRD."  I joined SIFE and found that I definitely picked the right major.  I want to plan things, I want to coordinate things - I want to manage things.  I was given a project called The Harvey's Project - to reopen a restaurant on campus as an entrepreneurship project class (there were WAY more things involved in it than just the final decision - red tape, etc. . . The University is a bureaucracy - what more can you expect?)  Anyway, I was trusted by just one person to take over - and I was successful! 

My success in that role led to the SIFE team entrusting me with their "high-profile" project - the Rising Phoenix Project.  I loved reorganizing the project while still keeping its mission in sight.  It gave me a sense of purpose, of accomplishment.  And the fact that my advisers hand picked me for the project let me know that I am highly respected.  Something I have always struggled with - it's hard to know sometimes if you're just doing a good job.  I know I've found my calling.  One day, I told my adviser, Tammy Cowart, that I would love to purchase the project from SIFE one day - to ensure that it would be able to continue on.  Then, I jokingly said, "once I get rich!"

Dr. Barbara Wooldridge (left), Dr. Tammy Cowart (right), and I on my graduation day.  December 17, 2011.
Say "SIFE!"

2. Never, EVER, judge a book by its cover.  This semester I started dating Brian Zemer.  If there is one thing he taught me, even indirectly - never think that you know someone's whole story just off of first impressions.  Those people that you think are horrible people often surprise you - they might seem like they are out to take what is yours, or ruin everything, but end up being the only one who will help you with what you need to do.  It's a huge surprise.  I think I taught the very same lesson to someone too.  One of my professors gave me a graduation present, something that is nearly unheard of - because of my drive to make something that has nearly no benefit to me, a success. 

I have to work on not judging people, I don't want to be judged, so why should I do it to others?  I have been offered jobs on the basis of being "pretty," or tall, or white, or a woman.  I want to be offered something on my merit - I want to earn it.  I try hard to show people the real me - an intelligent, ambitious woman who is not afraid of failure but who learns from it. 

3. Keep your friends close-  You never know when you wont have them anymore.  Your true friends are a part of your family - keep a close eye on them, know when they need you to be there.  To listen, and give them comfort.  I lost a friend this semester to suicide.  It made me realize that I should never take those people I care about for granted.  I will miss him, he was always the person I could turn to when I needed someone that cared about me.  If only I had known just how he really felt.  Rest in Peace, Jon, until we meet again one day.

4. Don't forget traditions.  Brian and I have developed a tradition: to eat at Stanley's.  When he and I started dating, I didn't consider it a date to go out to Stanley's, it wasn't romantic, it wasn't all that "special."  But now that we've done it together enough, it is a tradition.  If I go in there without him, it feels off, wrong.  And they even ask me where he is.  That's when I realized that I should be content with the little things that make your relationship with someone special.  Whether that be your boyfriend or girlfriend, or your parents, or just a friend.  If you do something together, hold onto that, make it yours. 



My little brother and I - post graduation

 Don't get embarrassed when your little brother screams at the top of his lungs when you walk accross that stage, "THAT'S MY SISTER!"  Own it!  That's your little brother, and he's proud of you, just like he has been since he was old enough to be proud of anything.  So, don't cover your face, don't be embarrassed - raise your head high, and walk accross that stage, knowing that he single-handedly is the loudest cheering section for anyone graduating that day.  And carry on the tradition at the next opportunity - maybe next time it'll be my turn to yell, "THAT'S MY BROTHER!" though, I don't think my voice booms like his does.

Birds of a Feather

It's been a little over a week since my last post, and lately I've been thinking about how people are afraid to differentiate themselves from the rest of the crowd.  Personally I don't think being different is such a bad thing, when it comes to your ambitions, drive, and personality (as long as we're talking about "good" personality traits!)  What made me finally decide to write this was something my brother told me last night.  He posted the "she was finally starting to realize what she lost."  So I liked it, and said "you go little brother!"  Then he tells me that his ex-girlfriend who I considered to be someone that I trusted up until a few weeks ago, and especially until last night, said that I was to blame for their (my brother and her) breakup.  I had nothing to do with it, in fact my only advice to her was that she should only leave the relationship if she was unhappy, because my brother was a good guy and he wouldn't do anything wrong to her on purpose.  So suddenly it's my fault.

Anyway, the point is: I've been in New Orleans for about 8 weeks now, and I've noticed the attitudes and differences in people here compared to those of people in Texas.  I know it's a different type of "bird" here, but I've also noticed that the attitudes are catching.  I'm starting to wonder if maybe the reason my brother's ex-girlfriend is suddenly such a bad person is because she wants so desperately to fit in here that she is picking up the bad habits of disloyalty, and flat-out lying to try and get her way?  She didn't seem like a bad person when I first met her, but now that the truth has come out, I'm not so sure her breaking up with my brother was a bad thing.

The REAL point is:  be who you are, be honest with anyone you meet, because in my book, family comes first, and if you say something about someone I love, they come first.

In other news:  I'm working on my resume today, and making my "five year plan." It's time to get passionate about it.